OK so steph said I should do a post on our poor sports at the Pine wood derby. I have been so bothered by this that I think it is a good idea to just voice it. As you all know we are seriously into racing it is just deep in our blood. So when stetson joined boy scouts last year we learned everything we needed to know to produce a fast race car. Isn't that what every parent and their scout does. work hard on your car and take it to win. Whats the point of the derby if you don't try to win. I know you can't always win and learning that is good for kids. But don't you at least try? Well last year we took the car not knowing what to expect I was so worried that Stetson wouldn't win and would be heart broken I had the speech all prepared for afterward. But ... that thing was dirty fast and I mean dirty fast. no one could believe how that thing..I couldn't believe that thing! So as the year passed and we all forgot (OR SO i THOUGHT) life moved past the derby. Then as the new year came and went so did another derby approach. Stetson grew excited as it got closer and I took the exact same knowledge that I had and we helped stetson create another derby car.
So on derby night we again worried and I told stetson that if he didn't win it was ok. He was especially worried because all week the boys at school in our ward were harassing him and saying that they were gonna kick his butt this year. It was relentless all week long. everyday he would come home from school with things the boys had said. so I told him that he did his best and that no matter what it was ok whatever happened. Little did I know what we were in for. The parents were awful I don't want to go into a lot of detail but I felt like we were stoned. Stetson was threatened that if he won again he would lose friends and they tried to cheat him out of a race saying he had lost one and shouldn't be where he was. I fought that and then saying that where his car came of the track because the track had a bolt sticking up he should lose that race. We also fought that. It was incredible the way the people acted. Stetson did win first place again and I was so proud of him. he was ecstatic.
As we left stetson said mom I hope none of my friends will be mean and not be my friends anymore. I told him he should never feel bad about winning he should be very proud of himself and if someone wasn't his friend because he won them at something then he doesn't want those type of people for friends anyways. I was so mad about the whole thing.
So my dilemma do We:
1. Buy stetson out and not do the derby next year and take him to do something else fun.
2. Fix stetson's car so that he will lose to appease all the jealous sorry losers.
or
3. Take what we know and make the exact same car as we did the first year and this year and go to the derby and try to win. And to heck with the rest of them. If they can't take it then that's their fault.
That's what I think we should do. I don't want to teach stetson that you should not excel at something if it hurts others feelings. If it was baseball would he strike out because his friend did and he doesn't want him to get his feelings hurt? Their will be things some of his friends will be better at than him and vice versa. But is it worth all the drama of the people who would like to stone us out of the neighborhood and call us cheaters because we won the derby...
What your opinion. Put yourself in the situation and answer honestly.
Maddux's 4th Birthday
14 years ago
6 comments:
This is my honest opinion. There are winners and their are losers. That is what life is all about. You have to lose sometimes to be happy when you win. If you don't know what it feels like to lose then how do you know how to be truly happy and appreciate it when your efforts pay off and you win. Job market, school, everything is competitive. We don't live the law of consecration, we live in a society that is competitive in all things. This bull crap about not giving out places in derbys and so forth is stupid. Yes, some people get their feelings hurt. I don't know about you but I was the only girl in my class in 10th grade that the coach made dress for and play j.v. volleyball. Was I embarrassed? Hell Yes! Did I cry and want to quite and not go to school ever again? Yes. Did I win the election for Student Body President when I ran? No. Did I cry and sulk and change schools, NO! I worked my @$$ off and learned how to serve that stinking volleyball overhand so the next year I was @#$# good. Then after the election I congratulated the person who won and thought her did ten times the job I would have done. Losing should motivate us to make ourselves better. I wish all parents understood this. The real world doesn't say, OH it's too bad you didn't work as hard as so and so I guess that's okay I will pay you the same anyway. Not happening and that is what a big problem is in society these days if you ask me. Kids need to be taught to be as good as losers as they are as winners. I would be very disappointed if He didn't race next time. To bad those other kids aren't getting it!
make a car that runs like hell and i will come and take care of the crowd
Dallas
I say make the car as good and as fast as you can. That is so awful that kids have to be that way and the sad part is it's probably coming from their parents. We ran into the same problem with Trayk's baseball team last year. We won all our games and the other teams and mostly the parents were rotten. The sad thing is we practiced and they didn't. They want to win but not put in the work. I HATED the drama, but I refused to encourage my kid to do less than his best so the other team could win. You hold your head up high and do your best. Good job Stetson for winning and being a good sport! You hit the nail on the head when you said that those kind of people don't belong in your life anyhow.
P.S. My boys derby is coming up. Would you mind emailing me your tips and tricks? Or I could call when I get back . . . just let me know.
Yes, Jelousy the green monster does rear his ugly head at many times, in many places over amny things.
I'm Sorry Stetson is having a hard time
Throughout the wrestling season this year, we have learned a valuable lesson about sportsmanship. The reason I bring this up is because the lesson that we learned is that some people have absolutely NO sportsmanship or class. Parents who do not exhibit good sportsmanship teach their kids to act the same way. It really is sad!!! Sad because, it's our kids who suffer. Garrett has actually suffered some ridicule from the mother, yes the mother, of another child whom he beat in a wrestling match. She went as far as stopping him on his bike when he was riding home from school to ridicule him about winning the gold medal over her son. She felt like her son was cheated out of the match. It's hard for Craig and I to sit back and not say anything but, we have tried our hardest to teach Garrett about good sportsmanship, when it comes to winning or losing. Because of this, we encourage him to fight hard and win but don't be discouraged if you lose. So, after my big long spill, my advise to you is...don't you dare back out of this come next year. You make the fastest, most competitive car you can and let the others try to keep up. One last thing that we've always tried to tell Garrett is...COMPETITION IS A GOOD THING!!! When somebody is better than you it should make you strive to keep up with them and maybe even be better than them. All of these parents that are having a fit about Stetson winning need a little lesson in SPORTSMANSHIP!!! (Sorry about the novel here. I'm just very opinionated when it comes to this subject!)
I feel the same way as everyone else. I think everywhere has the same kinds of problems, I know in baseball too that we have a lot of jealousy, but you know our boys work dang hard and Clint is out there with them everyday with them and it shows and we teach our kids to be competitive, we want them to win and succeed, if you teach them this early on they will succeed at everything in life no matter what it is, they get straight A's and are at the top in their classes too and this comes from wanting to be the best at everything
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